Scene of the Week: Colossal Clash in the Colosseum
There is a reason that people always acknowledge when an action movie “feels real”. It’s because movies about one man armies and vigilante killers are supposed to be straight up fantasy and not real life. That is a very good description of the fight scene you’re about to see below. It’s a showdown between two of the greatest martial artists in history, battling inside the most famous and impressive structure built by man. It’s a martial arts fan boy dream come true! It’s Bruce Lee vs. Chuck Norris in the Roman Colossuem!
Two fighters stare down across the concrete structure. First disrobing and then slowly stretching, flexing, and shaking out their glorious hair before inquisitive eyes of a small kitten. The fight starts out with both fighters gaining their distance, feeling out the other fighter and looking for holes in their skills. The first strike by Chuck lands directly on the jaw of Lee, sending him to the ground while Chuck puffs his chest above him like he’s posing for a caricature at the zoo.
Norris then delivers a combo straight out of the 90’s video game Killer Instinct and Bruce is forced to grab a handful of his chest hair to slow him down. Luckily, Chuck’s chest hair grows at an alarming rate and if you watch the film in HD you’ll notice that it’s already grown back within seconds.
The two then warp into slow-motion, probably the only way we, as the viewers, will ever be able to see them move. Then Bruce starts picking Norris apart at range. Delivering kicks to his entire body and then stepping back out of Chuck’s range before he can counter. It’s the perfect visual representation of Bruce Lee’s style of fighting.
Like a true gladiator, Chuck continues to fight despite his multiple injuries until that seemingly adorable kitten screams for blood and forces Norris into one last useless attack on Bruce. In the end, the kitten devours the body of the downed warrior (off screen, of course) and Bruce shows proper respect for the fighter as he exits the arena.