Bullet Points: ffolkes

Playing one character for a long time can be a double edged sword for an actor. Sure you have the steady work and consistent paychecks but it also stifles creativity and can lead to typecasting. What is an actor to do? Take a role that plays against the audiences expectations of course. A prime example is when a young star is tired of being viewed as a child actor and takes an edgy or risqué role to be taken more serious. It can also happen with established actors who have become synonymous with a certain character, for example Roger Moore up to 1980 had a successful career playing a suave spy in The Saint and the James Bond franchise. What was Roger Moore to do? Take a role as the eponymous arrogant misogynist consultant in ffolkes. Was it a smart move for Sir Roger Moore to play a character audiences weren’t used to? We can find out as I just so happen to have some Bullet Points for the 1980 film ffolkes.

• ffolkes ffusiliers – Rufus Excalibur ffolkes (Roger Moore, For Your Eyes Only) is a counter-terrorist consultant tasked by Fletcher (George Baker, The Spy Who Loved Me) of Lloyd’s of London to come up with contingency plans should the North Sea oil drilling platforms they are insuring come under attack. To say that ffolkes is eccentric would be an understatement. ffolkes is really an arrogant SOB that loves cats more than people, finds needlepoint helps him think, and is extremely prejudiced against women. In other words, ffolkes is the complete opposite of James Bond. To be fair, ffolkes lost both of his parents and had to live with his aunt and 5 sisters and wear their hand me downs. After ffolkes got married, his wife had 5 single sisters who expected ffolkes to support them. Although ffolkes is a jerk, he is extremely efficient and gets results and trains his team, known as the ffolkes ffusiliers, with the highest of standards.

• Fetching Formula – As a surprise to know one who saw the beginning of the film, a supply ship named Esther on route to the oil platform Jennifer is hijacked and underwater mines are attached to both Jennifer and another platform named Ruth. The hijackers demand a ransom of £25 million or the oil platforms with be destroyed causing way more than £25 million in economic losses. Lord Privy Seal Dennis Tipping (Jeremy Clyde) recommends letting Lloyd’s of London take care of the issue in case there are any casualties it won’t be the government’s fault. While I wouldn’t consider myself an expert on the Great Officers of State in the United Kingdom, I do know what a privy is. Why someone in charge of a privy is involved in counter-terrorism is beyond my expertise. The British send Tipping and Admiral Brinsden (James Mason) to the Jenny to work with ffolkes to execute his rescue plan.

• Fiendish Foes – As with any action film, you need some quality villains and ffolkes delivers with the hijackers. The group is led by Lou Kramer, played by Anthony Perkins in a mostly subdued but intense role, which makes his maniacal outbursts even more potent. His right hand man is the Coke bottle lens wearing Harold Shulman played by the always dependable Michael Parks (Death Wish V.) All the hijackers wear trench coat style rain coats as they were pretending to be reporters and I am pretty sure Shulman is wearing the Executive. The rest of the hijackers are adequate and as a whole don’t make too many mistakes, it is just that ffolkes is just too good. The plan and training go almost exactly as ffolkes predicted, save for a few minor hiccups that really lead to some tense moments, especially when Brinsden is aboard Esther. The highlight of the rescue mission has to be ffolkes getting help from the lone Esther female crew member whom ffolkes mistakes for a boy.

ffolkes is a film that allowed Roger Moore to go against type where he plays a real jerk, but he still manages to be a jerk that you root for so I think it was a successful move for the actor. The experienced cast makes some of the extended periods without action in ffolkes end up totally engaging, and the music is a real standout. It is amazing how something as simple as loading a supply ship can be made to feel like an epic feat thanks to the proper music. ffolkes might not be a Roger Moore movie that is as fun as any of his James Bond films, but it is still an exciting ride and worth watching just to see how poorly a man can treat women. Luckily for you, I have no disdain for anyone and have some Bonus Bullet Points for you.

• Also Known As – Those in the United Kingdom might recognize ffolkes as North Sea Hijack. It was also released on US television as Assault Force. The Jack Davies novel the film was based on was titled Esther, Ruth and Jennifer, the name of the ship and two oil platforms and the names of the three white cats ffolkes is awarded at the end in place of, in his opinion, worthless medals.
• “I’ll Skip Breakfast, Thanks” Quote – “I’ll have your balls for breakfast.”
• Familiar Face – The man in charge of Jenny is Robert King, played by another James Bond alum David Hedison, Felix Leiter in Live and Let Die and Licence to Kill.
• “I Know a Few People That Would Be in Trouble” Quote – “If any one of them farts in the wrong key he’ll end up with his brains all over the floor.”
• Come Again – During ffolkes’s explanation of his dislike of women he mentions both his parents died in childbirth. How exactly are they delivering babies in the UK?
• “It’s 5 O’Clock Somewhere” Quote – ffolkes is a big Scotch drinker and only drinks it neat, as it should be. When Admiral Brisden thinks it is too early to drink after being offered, ffolkes responds, “It’s four hours since breakfast, that’s too late.”
• True to Life – In real life James Mason was the avid cat lover, and all animals in general, just like ffolkes.  As an aside, I could listen to James Mason with his unique languid speech all day.
• “That’s Pretty Cold” Quote – “It’s cold enough to freeze the ass off a polar bear.”
• Not a Typo – Just in case you thought there were typos throughout this Bullet Points, ffolkes with the two lower case f’s is the proper spelling of the Old English last name of Rufus Excalibur ffolkes.